"The Interview" and Mental Health

My knowledge about "The Interview" (Oprah interviewing Mrs. Meghan Markle and her husband Harry) comes from news reports since I have not seen it and don't plan to, but what stood out to me is that Mrs. Markle spoke about her own real struggles with mental health as seen in the below bits (these are from various sources so not in order of the interview):

"I was really ashamed to say it at the time, and ashamed to have to admit it to Harry especially, because I know how much loss he has suffered. But I knew that if I didn't say it, that I would do it -- and I just didn't want to be alive anymore,"

"I just didn’t want to be alive any more. And that was a very clear and real and frightening, constant thought. And I remember how he [Harry] just cradled me.

""Right before we had to leave for that (event), I had just had that conversation with Harry that morning,"

"That you don't want to be alive any more?"

"Yeah," Meghan confirmed. She said that she attended the event with Harry that night because she felt she could not be "left alone" and recalled Harry gripping her hand tightly while in attendance at the Royal Albert Hall." 

""I went to the institution and I said that I needed to go somewhere to get help … And I was told that I couldn’t, that it wouldn’t be good for the institution.

I remember this conversation like it was yesterday, because they said: my heart goes out to you because I see how bad it is, but there’s nothing we can do to protect you because you’re not a paid employee of the institution."

There has been push back by some to the interview in part because as a member of the royal family/royal corporation the expectation is you just do not share your vulnerabilities with others. I see it as evidence even institutions which have been around for generations often do not know what to do when someone is in mental health crisis. If someone has enough courage to stand up and say they need help you find a way to get them help.  

When someone is in crisis you do not talk about the institution instead you find resources to help them. I would think based on the number of individuals who are part of the institution they would have several therapists on staff on an ongoing basis knowing that those who are part of the institution can't exactly walk down to the local clinic. Or at least have individuals who are trained in mental health crisis management. 

There has been push back from others which I would summarize as saying she should have known what she was getting herself into and should have been able to handle it. 

A) I am not sure if these individuals have ever read a book, it is common when you are in love, to look the other way or minimize in your head the power that attitudes and extended family will have on you, which later can become toxic. In addition when you are a first in any area you can not really know how everyone is going to respond.

B) A bee sting framework. Most people who get stung by a bee go ouch and maybe use some choice words around bees, but if you are allergic to bees that same ouch can become a matter of life or death. If you have never been stung by a bee you might not know you are allergic until it happens and even being warned that you will be visiting a bee hive does not matter if you get stung and realize you are allergic and can't breath.

And in this bee framework anyone can be allergic, it does not matter if you appear successful, or "have everything you should ever need", and you can never tell from just looking at someone if they are allergic. And you never say well your don't have the correct employment heading so while you are having an allergic reaction and can't breath we can't help you, nor seek others who could.

I am glad that Mrs. Meghan Markle was open about her struggles in "The Interview." Every time someone, especially someone who has been in the public eye, opens up about mental health challenges including suicidal ideation they do their part to decrease the stigma around talking about such issues. 

Being vulnerable is never easy, and made even harder when surrounded by others who think such information should not be shared or made public, but every time someone is willing to be vulnerable uncountable others are helped and feel more confident getting the help they need.

Mental health challenges can be experienced by us all and it is important to reach out when we need support. It is also important to reach out to those we think might be struggling as well as finding resources for individuals who come to us and need help. 

Sometimes the only way to keep ourselves safe and alive is to put ourselves first. And in truth sometimes when we do this we will be faced with those who refuse to see our suffering and tell us we can't get help, and in these cases even though it might feel close to impossible we need to keep going until we get the help we need in what ever form that might take.

If you or someone you know are experiencing suicidal thoughts or crisis,

call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255 or

 text HOME to the Crisis Text Line at 741741.