Compassion And Understanding

Now I have been getting lost in the comment sections of life, and yes I know that is never good, but I have noticed a real lack of compassion and understanding. Often in these comment sections this appears as individuals dismissing the struggles that others are going through. There seems to be an idea held by many that we can know the struggles someone is really having based on outside criteria and when people open up they are just "looking for attention." 

Important facts to remember

Socio-economic status does not prevent all struggles. Access to money does not prevent someone who is BIPOC from experiencing racism or anyone from experiencing mental health struggles. Now access to money can mean someone can get the help they need, or be able to leave a toxic situation, that others in a different socio-economic position could not, but it does not mean that access to money means someone does not face racism or mental health struggles.

Socio-economic status does not determine whether someone who is white has done the internal anti-racist work needed to work towards being anti-racist in all areas of their lives nor if they are working towards building anti-racist communities, organizations, and institutions. Neither does socio-economic status determine if someone is aware of the white privilege that has been codified by the institutions they interact with on a daily basis.

We all suffer, we all have experienced pain, which means we should all be compassionate when we see someone else is suffering or when someone tells us they are suffering. This can be shown in a classic Buddhist story:

Kisa’s only child, a very young son, had died. Bringing the body of her son with her, Kisa found Buddha and pleaded with him to help bring her son back to life. He instructed her to go back to her village and gather mustard seeds from the households of those who have never been touched by the death. From those mustard seeds, he promised he would create a medicine to bring her son back to life. Relieved, she went back to her village and began asking her neighbors for mustard seeds. All of her neighbors were willing to give her mustard seeds, but they all told her that their households had been touched by death. They told her, “the living are few, but the dead are many.

Now compassion does not mean we have to condone toxic behavior, or that we need to provide physical, economic or emotional support to everyone who feels like they are suffering, but it does mean we can acknowledge what they are feeling and say we are sorry you are hurting. This also means it is important to have self-compassion and self-awareness and know when leaving a situation is what might be best for all involved.